Imperfect Desires Chapter 210 – A Dead Star

*Flashback*

Life is a gamble. We all know it very well. But often we are so engrossed by the things we lost that we forget about the things we have. And that’s the true gambling of life. In order to attain what we lost, we end up destroying what we are left with.

Darren was also one of those people who didn’t understand this gamble of life. All he knew after that accident was that he lost. He lost something really precious to him. His leg injury was severe and honestly, he never thought he’d walk again.

“Don’t give up just yet, Mr. Salvay. After a year of rehabilitation, I’m certain that you’d be back on your feet again,” the doctor told him in a way to reassure him but it only dampened his spirits.

Darren barely gave him a nod and continued to stay silent. Dylan walked up to him and patted his shoulder saying, “Dazi, don’t look so dull. Do you know how happy I am to see you alive? I thought I’d lose you forever.” Dylan’s voice got heavy with emotions towards the end but Darren didn’t even react to him being a crybaby.

After a prolonged silence, Darren mumbled, “Do you know what happiness is for me, Didi?” Dylan looked at him as he spoke, “Speed. I only felt alive on the race track. I always felt like I had the wings to fly to the sky with that speed but in the end, I got nowhere.”

Dylan didn’t need Darren to explain anything to him. He certainly knew what Darren’s biggest wish was in life. Even though he didn’t know how his best friend felt but even if someone asked him again, he’d still choose Darren’s life over anything. “Who said you got nowhere? Besides, you’re only taking a break of a year or two. You’ll be back on that track again and I know it.”

Darren finally turned his eyes towards Dylan but didn’t say anything. How was he supposed to tell his best friend that he might never be able to hold a steering wheel again in his life? That accident was still very fresh in his mind. He remembered how desperate he felt when that truck hit his car toppling it over. If he had been saved a second later, he’d have burned alive. His body shivered at the mere reminder of that scene.

“Didi, can you help me up?” He had been lying in bed for weeks and was sick of it now. Since Dylan could understand that, he helped him sit in a wheelchair.

“Should I take you out for a walk?” asked Dylan.

Darren stared at him weirdly as he replied, “It’s 6 in the evening, where are you gonna take me for a walk?” Dylan scratched his head sheepishly. “Just get me to the balcony. I need some fresh air.” Dylan wheeled him towards the balcony where the light breeze could be felt making a serene atmosphere.

“I’m gonna bring some dinner for you. Anything else do you want?” inquired Dylan like the caring best friend. However, it was the first time for Darren to see Dylan paying so much attention to something. Since a young age, there was rarely a case when Dylan actually cared for something. When Darren shook his head, Dylan turned on his heel.

Darren was left alone looking at the sky littered with bright stars tonight. Since the sky was clear, he found the scene even more beautiful. He wheeled himself close to the railing and looked at the flower pots. 

“I can’t find a single firefly… Uwu!” 

Hearing that whining sound, Darren’s eyes instinctively looked towards his left. The balcony right beside his had a girl who was almost hanging on the metal railings while she wailed like a bloody kid. 

“Sister Xiu, stop acting like a kid. You can get hurt again,” he heard a male’s voice that came from behind her but he couldn’t see that person.

“I’m only hurt, not dead. Besides, isn’t being hurt a part of life? I can feel pain in my ankle even now, and that’s a reminder that I survived.”

Darren’s eyes widened in shock or surprise he didn’t know. He also didn’t know whether he was so shocked or surprised over those words or the person who said those words. Because the person who had spoken was Chen Xiu and Darren only saw her clearly when she pushed herself off the railing and turned to look at the person standing behind her. As the room’s lights fell on her face, Darren was baffled.

“I feel really sorry for you,” Han Bohai said to Xiu making her smile to falter for a moment before saying, “Sister Xiu, there is a difference in living and being alive. How long are you gonna fool yourself? You fell on the red carpet of an international award function, do you even realize what are the headlines going on back home?”

“Does it matter? I have a serious concussion because of that stupid camera, my ankle is twisted and yet, I’m the one being blamed. How pathetic people can get?” Chen Xiu’s sharp remark took Darren and Han Bohai both by surprise. She was always so gentle that even people like her assistant forgot that she was also a human who could get tired. Realizing how she spoke, she said, “Sorry for snapping at you. Forget it. Just find me a firefly.”

Han Bohai shook his head at how easily she ended up apologizing for being human. “Sister Xiu, look at the starry sky. Isn’t it more beautiful than those tiny fireflies?”

Xiu shook her head in negation with conviction as she said, “Little assistant, stars are dead lights dancing in the sky. They can only shine up there, but they can’t fly as they wish to. Fireflies are like flickering stars that are alive and can fly as they want.”

“But fireflies can never shine bright like stars,” reminded Han Bohai making Xiu glare at him.

“No need to rain on my parade,” said Xiu with a huff and added, “You look at the stars. If I wished to see one, I’d just look in the mirror.” The way she flicked her hair at the end of her sentence made Darren smile at her silly sassiness.

“C.o.c.ky much?!” said Han Bohai.

Like a child, Xiu stuck her tongue at him and bumped her shoulder with his before limping back inside to her hospital bed. Han Bohai looked at her back and felt sad. He knew why she hated stars so much. Those dead stars shining brightly reminded her of herself who was dead inside but was shining glamorously for the world.